I think one of the hardest things about trying to learn how to love myself.. is learning how to forgive myself.
I struggle with this cause my own personal demons want to put what I preceive as my past failures in front of my face every time I am starting to succeed at something. It is like a part of me likes seeing myself fail, and rubbing it in my face each time I screw up. It often feels like part of me doesn’t want me to learn how to forgive myself, that it has become the devil I know to the point that It has become my security blanket of sorts to beat myself up for past screw ups. Sigh
I often wonder if the reason why I can’t forgive myself, is because i don’t know how to do so? That I don’t know how to accept that things occured and move on? That I can’t take steps to learning to love myself until I learn to forgive myself.
light blub moment there.. wow
That is part of it isn’t it.. sigh.. I can’t get to the point of loving myself until I learn to forgive myself and others as well. Since anger towards others will most likely hinder me from accepting myself.